Lesbians, surfers and the worst massages

Look at me go, pure enjoyment!

 There is a difference between lesbians and dykes. A lesbian is every man's (or woman's) fantasy of a delicious pair of beauties having some fun, being sexy and sharing their love with the world...I wish I was a lesbian. Dykes on the other hand, I don't understand, too much camo and dog-tags. If you want to be with a man, then why are you with a woman dressed as a man? Interesting thought, you might say. But what does this have to do with the 3rd birthday party at The Origin? I will tell you...

This is a dyke

I am a bit of a snob when it comes to where and how I spend my time, perhaps 'snob' isn't the right word. It's just that life is so short and unpredictable that I would rather spend mine having as much fun as possible. Life is too precious to spend being surrounded by ugliness, stale smoke and broken bottles, this is the reason that The Origin (9 Clark Road, Durban) has to be one of my favourite clubs. "Durban's most stylish and exclusive entertainment venue" (http://www.theorigin.co.za/), is set across three levels in the historic Winston Hotel. It features four dance floors, amazing "talk to that handsome stranger areas", bars, balconies and a roof garden. It's the kind of spot you can go to in your  Sunday best and not have to worry about getting your heels stuck on some sleeping hobo in the corner. In fact, what I love about Origin is that nobody dresses like a hobo! The club is always packed with attractiveness, men, women, whatever - everybody is sexay!

The main attraction has to be The Engine Room, the downstairs dance floor where two of my favourite South African acts were playing; PH Fat and Haezer. So after a few tequilas and many hours on the dance floor I found myself on stage dancing next to a gang (or gaggle) of lesbians - beautiful girls. In preparation for The Origin's third birthday (I mention my excitement in the previous blog) I had got all my eight hours of sleep the previous night. I was ready for this. That's what I thought... What I didn't expect was to be kissed on the mouth and told that I "will get involved". Friends I am not sure what they meant by this but luckily before I had time to find out Haezer kicked the party up a gear with WTFIH. 

Let me explain this photo... as I said, I was told by these lovely ladies to get involved. The blond suggested that it would be an amazing idea if we all lifted our shirts for this photo. Then I laughed hysterically...

So there I was dancing like a loon on stage when South American/ South African popped up along side me. (Remember that guy). He had his signature Red Devil in hand and a smile that let me know that tonight was just beginning. We made our way onto the rooftop garden where we were met by a group of his surfer friends. After a half-an-hour earful of surfing  I received the most amazing massage from the South American, heaven. Until his friend, a man named Dingo, jumped in. I have never known a man with such stubby little fingers, I was in so much pain I had to call it a night. It was four am after all.  


I awoke the next morning with a sore body and strange bruises on my neck and shoulders. Chunks of hair was missing from my scalp. I was later told that Dingo had tried to brush out my knots... It was all worth it though!